So this was the big day. My official test day where I was instructed to come in for a blood test. 14 days after egg retrieval or, in other words, 11 days after the 3rd day transfer. The day we would finally get to know.
I did as instructed this morning and then we waited for the call. I had been going over the two possible answers again and again in my head. Hopeful of one and fearful of the other. What I did not expect was a third possibility. The nurse did not say the words I have dreamt of for so long: “Congratulations, you are pregnant”. Neither did she utter the words I feared: “I’m sorry, you are not pregnant”. Instead it was some kind of explanation about a low hCG level and that they would like me to come back for another blood test in a week.
I can hardly remember what she said precisely, because my mind just stopped. It took a while for me to realize that what she was actually saying was that we have a ‘weak’ positive on our hands. The hCG level was 42 mIU/ml and to be a clear positive they would like to see 150 mIU/ml. I also remember that she instructed me to keep taking my progesterone and said that it could be that it is just a bit slow. But it could also be that something is wrong.
After a bit of google searching, we have concluded that this result probably indicates that I am a little bit pregnant, so to speak. It would seem that hCG levels vary a lot from woman to woman in early pregnancy and that 42 mIU/ml on day 14 after retrieval could potentially be fine. So we are allowing ourselves to become happy – slowly. But we are also weary. Do we dare to embrace it?
This is yet another surprise twist to our seemingly endness journey which we could certainly have done without. But at the same time I’m thankful. I would take a weak positive over a negative any day!!